Whisky Reviews: The Lost Distillery Part 2

by Gen Parton-Shin

 

The Lost Distillery Part 2

I, for one, am no whisky connoisseur. My acquaintanceship with whisky began when I tried to seduce a woman obsessed with whisky. After boning up on all the right adjectives for whisky reviews, this is the last text I ever sent her (dated February 2, 2017).

“First it was noticeably woody, sometimes creamy too. Now it seems like the whisky suddenly turned dry. I wouldn't go as far as to say harsh. But it's definitely austere. Undeniably, still hot. Dignified in a way. Perhaps. For some people, that is how they like it to be.”

Needless to say, she ghosted me.

Factoring that in to qualify myself as a reviewer, here are my best attempts at describing my experience with the following three whiskies [also from The Lost Distillery]. By the way, who knew that that’s how you spell whisky plural?

 

 

Auchnagie Archivist 46% ABV

Floral, sweet, and with a little bit of a taste of honey, this whisky has a sharpness to it. The smell is leathery and inviting -- like a modest yet tasteful cologne that is noticed by one’s subconsciousness, but can be trusted to not upstage you. Speaking of colognes, sometimes when I go on dates, I spritzz on the Gucci cologne I received as a gift from an ex over 10 years ago. Is this a form of living in your past? Or have I been marked and simply don’t realize it? I’d say I’m wise to give the ladies what a lady chose for me. Men should know better than to trust themselves.

Lossit Classic 43% ABV

At first, the aroma shot me down memory lane to childhood in Japan on a hot summer day sitting on a dentist’s chair. Cicadas loud in the background,, I remember that dark liquorish-like liquid they would dab on a cotton swab. Then I went for a taste (of whisky of course). It was as rich and sweet as a ball of cotton candy, accompanied by a strong presence akin to the smell of wood chips and fireplaces, burning marshmallows, and some sticky pine cones you picked up while walking through the woods early during the day. It’s a sweet memory that we all have our own version of.

Stratheden Archivist 46% ABV

After guiding it across the inner lining of my mouth for some time, letting it gently cover the surface of my tongue, to the back of my mouth, the flavor that sticks out is... nutty. Do you think I’m going for the cheap laugh? This whisky is actually rather rich, in orange. There is also a temperamental chocolate flavor hidden in there that tricks you by disappearing and reappearing when you least expect it. The closest I can compare it to is that feeling when you’re not sure if she’s finally ghosted you or you are simply low on her priority list. Let’s just say some know how to elevate their status. Sweet? Sometimes. Subtle? It tries to be.

 
 

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Gen was born in London, raised in England, Japan, and Korea. Gen made his debut in the Japanese musical theatre scene before coming to the US, starring in the Official Japanese cast of RENT (Angel), Next to Normal (Gabe), Rocky Horror Show (Rocky), Dracula (Jonathan), Bare (Jason) and Mitsuko. US credits include Miss Saigon (Thuy), Monte Cristo (Benedetto), 167 Tongues (NYIT nomination) and The History Boys (Akthar), as well as numerous readings and workshops including Other World and Kpop. Gen is also the host of cable show TV Japan Club and NYC comedy show Batsu!. Upcoming releases include TV mini series Hodo Buzz. @genpartonshin